Alzheimer’s – 10 Things You Need to Know
‘I know my thoughts are clear, I’m confused when I can’t remember.’ Pat (my mum)
My mother had Alzheimer’s and when she started to tellme things that I found curious and interesting I decided to record our conversations. Fortunately, she retained her faculty of speech, albeit limited towards the end, and we continued our exploration together for three and a half years to the end of her life. Being a psychotherapist with an interest in neuroscience I brought my understanding to what she was telling me. But I’ve quoted her to demonstrate the points.
- Alzheimer’s dementia clarification:
‘I have no brain cells left.’ My mother’s thoughtful self-reflection when she was at an advanced stage.
There is a lot of confusion between the terms ‘Alzheimer’s’ and ‘dementia’. There are over a hundred different types of dementia and Alzheimer’s is one type. However, it accounts for between 60% and 80% of all dementias and is the most feared. Furthermore, within the category of Alzheimer’s there are many variations.
- How to communicate with people with Alzheimer’s – The LEV LP:
Listen, really listen to them.
Engage with them in their world.
Validate their experiences – they are real for them.
Do all this with Love in your heart.
Be Present.
- Thoughts continue:
‘I know my thoughts are clear, I’m confused when I can’t remember.’
When people with Alzheimer’s can’t remember what they have just said it is easy to presume they can’t think. I challenge this assumption. My mother’s comment demonstrates she was still capable of thinking clearly even when she was forgetful. Be aware, others might experience this but not be able to verbalise it.
- Feelings matter:
‘These are wonderful moments. Remember them and feel them.’
We need to be aware of the feelings of people with Alzheimer’s, and more importantly, our own feelings when we are with them. Feelings matter because they are about emotions and emotions hold meaning.
- Meaning matters:
‘You talk to me. Nobody else talks to me.’
Of course, others talked to Mum, but not in a way that was meaningful to her. It is through meaning that we experience connection, and it doesn’t require the language part of the brain that is damaged in Alzheimer’s. So, expressing or doing things that have meaning is key.
- Emotional memory remains:
‘I’m remembering all the difficult times – all the people.’
Research by Professor Oliver Turnbull et al., Bangor University, found that the emotional memory of people with Alzheimer’s continues even when other kinds of memory have diminished.
- Emotional learning continues:
‘We’re much closer now, unlike before. We’re like twins.’
Mum and I had a troubled past, but her Alzheimer’s changed that. Turnbull found that emotional learning continues, right to the end.
- Empathy increases exponentially:
‘The eyes. I can tell everything through the eyes, every expression, every feeling.’
Researchers at UCLA, San Francisco Memory and Ageing Centre, found that as cognition declines, empathy increases in people with Alzheimer’s, and this happens exponentially. People with Alzheimer’s are acutely aware of other people’s feelings and mimic them. It is important therefore that we are aware of our feelings and the affect we have on others.
- Emotional contagion happens:
‘I see love coming from your eyes.’
‘Margaret is home, and I am home. You are there and between and joining. Our energies are connected.’
People with Alzheimer’s experience emotional contagion. The term ‘emotional contagion’ means the convergence of emotions between two or more people. In other words, they catch emotions.
- Altered states of consciousness can be transcendental states:
‘It’s difficult living between two worlds.’
‘The stillness of deep love, I can’t’ find words to describe it.’
‘I am at peace. I have no worries and no fear.’
‘We’re learning we’re immortal. Death is nothing to be afraid of.’
‘Love never dies.’
People with late-stage Alzheimer’s have intermittent altered states of consciousness. These can be transcendental and help to prepare them for a good death. Knowing this also brings great comfort to their loved ones. These findings are substantiated in a recent book, Lucid Dying – How We Understand Life and Death, by Sam Parnia, MD, PhD, an eminent researcher in the field..
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The aim of this blog is to raise awareness about Alzheimer’s, and I hope you have found what I have written helpful. Don’t forget to pass it on to others who might benefit.
Maggie La Tourelle is the author of The Little Book of Alzheimer’s Revelations – Between Two Worlds, and The Gift of Alzheimer’s – New Insights into the Potential of Alzheimer’s and its Care. There is also an audio play, Between Two Worlds, starring Juliet Stevenson and Jane Laportaire, based on the book, The Gift of Alzheimer’s.